moments i do not live for.

came up with a list of moments that i've encountered in my lifetime that i could REALLY do with out...

when you pull out a cup when a guest is at your house and you realize you failed to wash the lipstick stain correctly off of the cup.

the awkwardness of not answering your phone because you know it’s a bill collector...friend: “aren’t you going to get that bruh?” you: “nope, i'm giving YOU my undivided”

when you can't think straight because you have to go #2 while someone is talking your ear off.

when you have to hypocritically agree with someone while they are proclaiming their hate for people that put the oj container back in the fridge with only a little bit of juice left.

coming up with an excuse as to why you don’t want your dude to go with you to get your eyebrows done because you know you also have to get your lip done this time too.

grabbing a cup that is hot but having to play it off that it didn’t hurt that bad in order to save some cool points (you're running low)

attempting to slam your door to show you are mad but the door catches some wind and ends up shutting lightly or not at all. So you have to do a “do-over”

strategically planning when you will go #2 at work so that no one knows it was you.

going for coffee on a "first date" (coffee is such a safety zone) you take a gulp of your excruciatingly hot coffee (as opposed to a sip because apparently all cerebral matter is absent on first dates)then not knowing where to spit it, because you don't want to spit it back in the cup and reveal who you REALLY are on the first meeting; so instead you just swallow the scorching coffee while all of your taste buds singe off on the way down.

back in college not understanding what the professor was talking about so you decide to take a light nap - which turns into a slobber fest...this then leads to you waking up from a mild heart attack because your head slipped from your fist nearly smashing your face on to the desk.

don't know if anyone can relate but if not, entertain yourself with my hapless moments. good day.

vivenorie.